Friday, July 31, 2009

Code

jrl1
Of my present population of 9 children who call me aunt, 4 are nephews.

Boys.

None of which seem all that impressed with Aunt Sissy.

That would be me.

I would be okay with my lack of status amongst the nephew population if they weren't all so stinkin' cute.

I hate rejection from a stinkin' cute group of guys.

Of my nephews, JRL is the oldest. He is the sage of the group, clocking in at a wizened seven years old.

My Dr. Sis-in-Law is his long-suffering and amazingly patient mother.

For, you see, JRL is at the extreme end of the male prototype.

As in, at the extreme end of the Engineering Male Prototype, an important designation when it comes to describing the breadth and width of the differences between the male and female of the species.

The Engineering Male Prototype is seen in the guy for whom the world should operate by a predictable and agreed-upon logical set of standards.

They are sometimes referred to as Vulcans.

And that would be JRL.

His foray into understanding the female of the species has been treacherous and rocky.

JRL would not understand the need for the above adjectives; why use the terms 'treacherous' and 'rocky' when you could just say 'difficult'?

Dr. Sis-in-Law was recently packing up her family for a trip. She was in her bedroom and JRL was in his. Dr. Sis-in-Law needed JRL to bring her something and she called out, "JRL?!?"

She heard a muffled "Yeah?" come from the vicinity of his bedroom.

"JRL!" she called, a bit more stridently.

"Uh-huh?", again came back, quiet and still down the hall.

"J---R----L!!!!!" she yelped. "Get down here to my room now!"

JRL made an appearance at her door, eyes wide and bewildered.

Dr. Sis-in-Law said, "Young man, when I call you name, you come to me. Don't make me call for you multiple times. If you hear me call you name, you get down here!"

JRL pressed his fingers to his temples and in an anguished tone cried, "Mom, it's like you have a secret code or something!"

Engineering Male Prototype.

Inference and context not required.


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